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PART 6: Growing in Intimacy » In matters of dating or courtship, I generally recommend that people either get married or break up within a year or so of beginning a dating relationship.
I also believe that this recommendation applies with equal force to single men and women in college.
I've arrived at this conclusion by thinking through a number of biblical principles.
We might even say that getting to know one another better and more deeply is (up to a certain limited point, of course) the very of a dating relationship.When two people are dating — especially when it's going well and two people are really into one another — the desire to spend more and more time together, to know each other better and better, to confide in each other more and more often and exclusively, is overwhelming.As your general comfort level around each other rises, that momentum grows even more. We'll assume, per another clear principle from Scripture, that both members of our college couple are Christians.On most college campuses, that likely puts the two of you in the same relatively small social circle.
Perhaps both of you are active in the same campus ministry, you go to the same church.Over time, maybe you take some of the same classes, live near one another, etc.In that context, living with the desires I've just described, how likely do you think it is that over the course of two or three or four years — some couples date over most of their college years — you will be able to maintain enough emotional discipline and distance to avoid acting emotionally and relationally "married"?I've spoken to numerous "long-dating" couples, in college and beyond, who other than living together, could do little to intertwine their lives any more than they already are.